Author Archives: huen33

After 5 days, our bodies had left behind the perfect mould of our backsides on the couches at the Caravan Park in Eden. We had spent that much time on them it started to feel like we were wearing the couches as underwear. Once again we had turned the lounge area at a caravan parkContinue reading “The Last Hurrah.”

As the train chugged away from the Lithgow station I was fairly relieved that the dick measuring exercise didn’t eventuate. Mainly because I would of come up short. But before I got to dream of Tom Cruise in a Hawaiian shirt mixing us fancy drinks, I managed to have one more sook before leaving theContinue reading “What a spot!”

Wine Country, the natural habitat of wankers. It was an eye opener to see these creatures venture out of their urban settings and watch them indulge themselves in their wilderness habitat. On the second night in our luxurious caravan park, sitting poolside, I entered into a bit of chit chat with a young glass sniffer.Continue reading “It’s a small world sometimes.”

After needing a few days to digest the pizza we had in Armidale it was time to set off once again. We thought highly of Armidale, it was a great little town. All the old buildings in the Main Street and around the Showgrounds gave the place plenty of character. The farmers had a springContinue reading “The Kindness of Strangers.”

After leaving the comforts of Keithy George’s house, we were back on the road. Since the “China virus” has swept all before it, we hadn’t made a visit to the Australian institution that is Bunnings. Being a Sunday and having one in the vicinity, it would’ve been rude if we didn’t call in. For healthContinue reading “We’ve been to the promised land.”

After the girls left us in the beer garden at the Rosewood pub, the local reptiles started to get a bit restless. When one leather handbag said to the other “ your not my cup of tea” we read the tea leaves and decided to step back into the oven. Upon leaving I gave AnnieContinue reading “Before the Flood.”

Hi my name is Matt, this is my partner Ana and together we are survivors! “Survivors of what?” I hear you say. “The big Q, Queensland!!” After 4223.5 km we finally made it out. The land of the big crab, the big melon (the fruit, not my head) and the enormous bogan! You have beenContinue reading “Survivors”

What we would give to be back at the house “ the fist” built, sitting on the couch with the aircon on. It’s got hot now. Nothing like ginger Pete experienced, a red nut I met in the U.K. who once let out a scream when the mercury hit a whopping 25 degrees and letContinue reading “Someone left the oven on”

Last time we left you we were up at Cape Hillsborough enjoying some time off our asses. We had met a bloke named Paul involved in the Adani coal mine protests a few months back up at Wallaman falls. We got chatting and he offered us his place at Cape Hillsborough if we were goingContinue reading “Not everything is as it seems.”

“Fuck off Clive!”And with that let me introduce you to Townsville’s infamous magpie. Just like his namesake Clive Palmer this Clive is also a cunt and enjoys fucking people over. Clive the magpie resides outside of Fat Clive’s office in Townsville. He gets his name because when he swoops people out the front of PalmersContinue reading “Fuck off Clive!!!”